Just Keep Going

I had a couple of conversations this week with moms who feel like things are a little out of control, so here’s what I want you to know—

Less than a year after my dad passed away from cancer, I had a daughter. 

It was bittersweet for me.. grief + pregnancy hormones + exhaustion + responsibility of caring for now TWO children + moments of euphoria +weird, lonely stretches of time where no one called me. It was an emotional fog I felt I might never find my way through.. but I slowly did, I slowly AM. .

Motherhood is a crucible. 

When your inner world needs tending, the outer world doesn’t stop.. or even seem to care about the storm clouds raging in your heart. So you put on your big girl pants and keep doing all the things moms do—carpool, laundry, stories, baths and food..you just keep going like a numb, dutiful soldier. .

But then one day, .. the fog lifts and you wake up feeling a little lighter, you laugh a little more, you see glimpses of possibilities you forgot were possible. You remember yourself and your purpose. 

The glimpses stretch into longer visions, a new sustained reality … and you can SEE again.

So, I want you to keep going, ok? Even and especially when it feels like too much, you just. keep. going. Make the sandwich, sign the forms, wash the onesies, load the dishwasher.. and don’t dread it or resist it. Let it ground you. Let the seeming monotony of it all be the thing that tethers you to the outer world so that you’re not swept away by the storm inside. Use motherhood as an anchor. Use it as a medicine.

I know it might not feel like it now, but it IS HEALING YOU. 

Just. Keep. Going.